I officially can't do it. Thought I had the will to, but no. Weak. Not seeing you is great, but when you're right in front of me it's just... I cave. I admit. Too difficult. I honestly thought I put an end to it. For once, I was so pleased with myself. But I guess I will never really forget. Suppression is temporary. I'll have to face it as it comes. I just wished you'd stayed longer. I do remember every single conversation. Yes, every single word, phrase, sentence. Like it's imprinted in my mind. I hate how my mind replays the scenes over and over again, like a damaged video cassette tape. Wasn't looking forward to it when I heard you were coming. Cause I just knew. Knew that this would happen. And indeed it did. Happy yet disappointed with myself for not having enough willpower. I swore I would use every single ounce of determination to suppress whatever remaining feelings that existed. Easier said than done, really. Less contact, everything kept to it's minimal, would more or less suffice.